A joyous encounter

Indescribable, uncontainable,
You placed the stars in the sky and You know them by name.
You are amazing God
All powerful, untameable,
Awestruck we fall to our knees as we humbly proclaim
You are amazing God

The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of His hands. Day after day they pour forth speech; night after night they display knowledge. There is no speech or language where their voice is not heard. Their voice goes out into all the earth, their words to the ends of the world. (Psalm 19:1-4_)


Today is Christmas Day; Dec 25, 2009.
To be honest it doesn't feel a lot like the Christmas that I'm used to back home in Canada. The weather here in Mozambique might be what's throwing me off the most, this great lack of snow, and feeling in my toes.

But while it doesn't feel like the traditional holiday out here to me, there's still something incredibly profound in the air.

Invasion day.

Christ, with all the fullness of God, became part of His creation in order to reconcile all things to Himself. Whether things on earth, or things in heaven, 'by making peace through his blood, shed on the cross.'

All things were created by Him and for Him. He will sit enthroned forever; his renown endures through all generations.

This morning I woke up at around 7:45AM. I find it nearly impossible to sleep in here. That's the latest that I've ever slept here, as most mornings I'm up (even on days off) at around 6 or 6:30. There have even been a few days where I couldn't sleep past 530 so I just got up to spend some time sitting alone with Jesus. The real cause I think for most of this is that we go to bed really early on the farm. When the generator is shut off at 9pm, we head for bed. The latest that I've stayed up in the last month is 10:30pm.

Well, that was before last night. See, we had been invited to a Brazilian Missionary family's going away/it's Christmas, party. And true to form, we weren't faced with food until 9:30pm. I mean luckily we we warned about that, and we didn't arrive until 8pm anyways. But I somehow forgot to eat yesterday? I did have a few bits of baked goods at Dwight and Lynn's as we were doing some extra baking and watching Jingle All the Way with Arnold Schwarzen-guy, but besides that I didn't actually eat anything. I didn't notice until about 830pm, and when the food arrived I was ravenously hungry. After the meal we watched a short 'ode to the family' with seizure capabilities (the photo on screen changed about once a second hahaha), and then got settled in to play a game.

The game was Yankee Swap, or 'Dirty Santa'. They played this one in Season two of the office, episode... 14? It's the episode where Michael, the boss, buys an iPod for their office $20-or-under secret Santa party. Then when he receives a pair of knitted oven mitts, decides to change the game to Yankee Swap so that he can try and get a better gift. Basically you can choose to open a new gift, or take one that is already open. It was a lot of fun playing with this group, and people got pretty into it. The gifts were pretty random things, from a small box of chocolates, to some paper napkins, to random pieces of clothing. The look on one of the little girl's face as she opened this gift changed from sheer excitement, to bewilderment as she pulled an empty jar out of the wrapping. She had no idea what was going on.

Then after all 35 of us had taken the time to get up, unwrap a gift, debate about it, and then swap it, time was already running WAY past our bedtime. All of us at ASAM believe, 'Now is our time [to sleep]!'.

So after a hefty dessert, and some more talking around the table, we finally got ready to leave. Turns out we were picking up a vehicle from the family who is leaving, so we weren't quite out of Chimoio yet. At 01:40AM we arrived back at the farm, and by roundabout 01:50AM I was curling up on my cot.

So, 6 hours later when I woke up I wasn't quite ready for it. I was tired and yawning, but really was not able to sleep any longer. I decided to head over to the guest cottage and see what was going on. No one was around, as I had kindof figured, being 7:45 on Christmas morning after having been up 4 hours past bedtime last night. I sat down on the couch that smells like dog, and decided to finish Forgotten God (Francis Chan). Well technically, I had already finished it, and the last bit of reading in it is a chapter from his first book Crazy Love. But i still really wanted to read it again.

In these pages he is describing the awesomeness of God. His power, His holiness, His love, His just nature. It was really a powerful time of worship for me as I just kneeled before this God, soaking in His presence.

While I was worshipping, I felt that I should lay prostrate on the floor before Him. I then had a vision that I was approaching the entryway to His throne-room. As I stood at the threshold, I was breathless and in total awe of the magnificence of Him on the throne. Suddenly I felt His holy gaze focus on me. I have no way to describe it. In that moment I felt completely vulnerable, completely stripped of all of my excuses and defences. It was such a moment of fear, the righteous God enthroned before me in the centre of His temple. Transfixed by His 'eyes' I didn't know what to do or say. I was reminded of Isaiah and thinking of all of my sin I cried out "I'm not worthy!!". Being beside His pure holiness I felt so... evil. All at once I was overcome with the shame of things I had done, I was so afraid because He is just, and I don't deserve to live for another instant on this earth, or the next.

I don't know how long I stood there for. But suddenly I was reminded 'I have a plea', and I had confidence. I shouted "Jesus!!!" from the core of my heart and soul, and there He was. I was still standing at the threshold of the room. The Father on His throne was to my left in the centre of the room, and Jesus stepped out of the fog of brilliance (which filled the whole room) into my sight. I felt the LORD God look from me, to His Son, and then back to me. He extended the rod in his right hand towards me (reminiscent to me of the story of Esther), and it was as if He smiled at me. I stepped into the throneroom, and again was overcome with what can only be described as pure, unadulterated, emotion. I fell to my knees in worship, and saw Jesus step closer to me. He reached out His hand, and traced the image of a cross on my forehead. I closed my eyes as I felt His blood slick on my skin. He was atoning for my sin. Taking me back to the cross.

God being outside of time, completely permeates it with His presence. He can take us to moments where we have been broken, and heal us there. Because He is still there, just as much as He is here with us right now, and just as much as he is with us 5 years from now, 20 years from now. He's thinking about the day He gets to take you home. He's there, right now, with you. Your hand in His walking into His Father's throneroom saying, with that big old grin on His face, "Look Dad, here he is."

I opened my eyes, looking into His face and said "I accept Your cross Jesus, I accept your blood." My entire self, my whole being, my whole consciousness, was consumed with His presence. He was in all of me. He'd been waiting for my invitation.

Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. (1 Cor 6:19-20_)

Seeing the God of the Universe like that, so indescribable and awesome and holy. And then knowing that He's waiting for us to ask Him into our lives? For us to choose to accept His gift? It blew me away. One day we all will bow. I know that for sure. It wasn't a question in my mind before, but now it's a totally new level of understanding.

We all, who with unveiled faces contemplate the Lord's glory, are being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit. (2 Cor 3:18_)

Amen. Let us throw off all that hinders us. Let's run towards Him with abandon. Let our lives become 'even more undignified' for His glorious name.

Let the rocks be kept silent for one more day.